carbo and taxol

Ele

first appt Monday,  for chemo i’m already so upset about it and extremely nervous,  i don’t like new things or places that i haven’t been before... i did walk by the chemo room but it was a quick one two …. it causes panic attacks……. can someone kinda tell me what to expect and the step by step play by play of the first day,  i was told but i can’t remember anything and i didn’t write it down….. i know i’ll be there for four hours …. one is a 3hr and the other is an 1hr….. can they give me anything before the chemo drugs to make sure i don’t get sick or am not panicking…. ugh i can’t even think my mind is all over i feel like i’m spinning 

Strongwoman

@Ele
  Your feeling of anxiousness is normal and your team of nurses that are there will help you through it.  Be verbal and let them know how much this gives you anxiety.
 The nurse you have will walk you through everything. When mine was started, they stayed with me to see how I was reacting or tolerating it. I was starting to feel unwell but the nurse picked up on it right away. They stopped treatment and then started giving me medications before doing what they call "rechallenging it".  A brief period of time is waited after the meds (half an hour) and then they start the chemo again. I was able to tolerate it better after that.  My first day I was there from 8am-4pm.  I would advise having someone to drop you off and then pick you up.  It is a long day and you won't be up to driving.  I know I wasn't.
 I would advise drinking water or gingerale during your treatment.  I was quite thirsty.  If lunch is not provided bring some snacks that you can eat.  I had to pee a lot during the treatment too.
 It is the unknown of it all that causes the anxiety.  Not knowing what will occur, how you will feel, what reaction or no reaction your body has.  I do know that due to the steroids they gave me before treatment, I came home ravenous and ate lots.  The next day I wasn't feeling the greatest and didn't have much of an appetite.  Have on hand at home things like gingerale, Popsicles, ensure, ginger chews and crackers and cheese.  They help. Also phone your oncology team the following day if you aren't feeling great as they may be able to prescribe you something.  Don't tough it out, call and see what they say.
 I brought some things to do but never did them as I just didn't feel like it. So not sure if that helps or not.  I had a bag I took and had in it, a blanket (they usually have them there too), small pillow, food and water.  I also took an extra plastic bag or two just in case I felt ill on the way home.  I was not ill but took them anyways.
  I wish you all the best on Monday.  It is another process to go through and we are here for you.  When you feel well enough, let us know how you made out. Sending you a BIG virtual hug.🤗

Fearless

@Ele Sorry to be so late in replying to you and your concerns. I've been on a mini holiday.  So by the time you see this you Day 1 will have been over and I hope the experience was a positive one.

Strongwoman captured the essence of your anxiety.  Fear of the unknown is so powerful.  Because I lived so far away from Toronto when I started treatment I didn't have the benefit of one of their workshops on the topic to prepare me for my Day 1 so arrived cold but convinced myself I could handle it.  But sitting in the waiting room with the reality right there I have to admit I broke down in to tears.  Here I am six years later and still thankful for the two people who got me through it.  It was pre Covid so my husband was able to be with me and still remains my rock.  And the nurse who was assigned to me.  When she came out to get me and saw my emotional state she was so kind to sit down, put her arm around me and talk me through all of my fears.  

We all respond to chemo differently so one's experience may not be yours.  My first day not so great.  The Carbo just fine but I had a bad reaction to Taxol...now when I say bad, it was noticed immediately and dealt with in seconds.  Just meant I couldn't have Taxol and had to be switched to an alternative and from then on and now on my fourth recurrence and fifth round of chemo it's been very easy.  I have mild queasiness for a day or so after chemo, sometimes some aching muscles and joints that Tylenol fixes up and that's about all.  Apparently I'm one who tolerates chemo very well so hope you're lucky like me. Fatigue is the worst side effect for me.  Having been very active before my diagnosis, that's disappointing to need naps and rest time frequently but I've learned to adjust my expectations.

On Thursdays I host a live chat at 1pm ET.  It's on hold this month but we'll be picking up again the first Thursday in September. Love to have you join us.  And in the meantime let us know how your experience was today, reach out with any further concerns or questions, and know you're not alone in this. Our community is here for you all the way.

Thinking of you and wishing nothing but good things, 
  

Ele

I made it through, and holy moly I certainly hope it was just a bad day and there not all this horrible… I think it was due to all the stress and anxiety, I threw up numerous times even before treatment started …. my mother was suppose to meet me there and didn’t show that certainty did not help…. I rather not speak of that ….. i do not like the “chemo room” i did not leave my chair whatsoever,  my back is killing me probably from not standing up or just walking to the bathroom …. i’ve been drinking lots of water but no food,  it honestly it just disgusting to me at the moment; although i did have lunch so crackers and cantaloupe and a protein bar…..  i’ve taking Tylenol and it is doing absolutely nothing…. i’m mad and upset and just frustrated i do not like this,  my face also feels like it’s on fire but no fever…


can’t wait for a live chat something to look forward too thank you for all your kind words @Strongwoman & @Fearless_Moderator

Strongwoman

@Ele
 I am sorry to hear that your support did not show up. That must have been tough.
 Throwing up due to stress/anxiety must have been awful.
  I would agree, treatments aren't great. Perhaps keep in mind why it is being put in your body. I don't think any of us like the fact of what it is and that we have to put our bodies through it. I tried to chunk it down while having treatment. First one done, then next is 2nd.  By the time the 3rd one hit, I could mentally say I am half way done. Then I really didn't think about it again until the 5th one and then I could say one more to go!
  You may feel hot from it too.  I was going through surgically induced menopause so didn't know which was which for myself.
Did your Oncologist give you any prescriptions for anything afterwards?  If not, see how you feel tomorrow and then call if you need it. It's what they are there for.
Keep taking your temperature for the 2-3 days afterwards.  Writing down how you feel, what you ate, drank today and the next few days is helpful too.
  On my first day, I waited too long to go to the washroom and had some leakage.....that was embarrassing for me and I learned not to wait the next time around.
  On my 2nd visit, I was transferred to a local chemo unit so I didn't have to travel an hour before and after my session.  I felt more relaxed there and it was smaller which helped too.
  Try and get some rest tonight and keep up your fluids the best you can.
  I won't be on the live chat this week as I have an oncology appt but am aiming to join the following week.
 Hugs to you!  Just think.....you did it and it is done for now.🤗

Ele

@Strongwoman

That’s a wonderful way to look at it thank you, I will be mindful of that.  My oncologist told me to call if I need anything,  I’m hoping it was just the sitting;  I’m ideally active and don’t really sit for an hour or more at a time,  but if i’m sore tomorrow and still have a hot face im calling,  i’ve been journaling my hand cramps up and is itchy, i have read that it can be a reaction plus i’m pretty sure the cramp is just from holding on to the pen with tension lol…. I do have Benadryl if it gets worse. I’m extreamly tired but my mind won’t shut off, doesn’t help i’m on my phone ….. time to turn it off and just go to bed.   Thank you 😊 

Fearless

@Ele Live chats will start up again the first Thursday in September so hope to see you then. In the meantime a quick question if you're comfortable answering.  Is your chemo being done at a Regional Cancer Centre or a satellite operation at your local hospital?  And as for the face flush and the itchy hands, Taxol particularly can have a delayed allergic reaction.  IF you stil have the effects try the Benedryl.  It's just OTC meds and won't hurt you. And keep up your jouralling.  You''ll find overtime it's a great way to release some of your emotoinal feelings.  But do ensure your cancer care team are aware of how you feel emotionally and physically.  Don't wait to see if it gets worse.  The earlier they know you have a problem the faster they can help. 

Ler's hope that now that you've gone through the first one and have more familiarlity your anxiety will lessen and do take Strongwoman's advice and try to more around.  It will certainly help the back aches and even help you emotionally.  

Ele

@Fearless_Moderator. I shall definitely “see” you all then. Im in Winnipeg so regional. Todays the day it all came crashing down, I was fine all week with little side effects so I lived my life went out visiting…enjoyed the weather ….. but today oh no i feel like S*it i have the worst headache,  my ear left side only is sore my body feels like it’s caring 100 plus pounds more weight and my legs are as heavy as a filled bbq tanks.  

Strongwoman

@Ele
  Welcome.  It is hard to pace yourself when you feel well and then when you don't, you hit a wall kind of like you did.  We all experience it a bit differently.  Even without chemotherapy I still experience these walls.  I feel good and think, I am going to do X, Y and Z today.  Well I start with X and make it through and start on Y and then realize....nope not going to make it to Z today.   But there is tomorrow to do Z and maybe finish up Y.  
 This is where you will need to self regulate, give yourself permission to rest and recoup.  This looks different for all of us.  I sometimes have days where I call it "vegitate" where I have no energy to do anything except drink water, have some food that is not difficult to make, nap, watch Netflix and hope someone else is making dinner or I have something easy to prepare. Then the next day is usually better and I can do some of my normal things.  It ebbs and flows and I have learned to go with it and not fight it.
  I do hope you feel better soon and that the wall you hit will be brief.
Looking forward to chatting next week as well.
Take care