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Feeling so low, worn out and discouraged today.

BellaDonna1959
BellaDonna1959
in Encouragement and Support
Next week is chemo #3.  They don't know yet if it's helping at all or if I have hi or low serous ovarian cancer.  They don't know if there is a genetic component.  I haven't asked for a prognosis because most of what I read is grim.  It's stage 3C started in ovaries, has spread all over the peritoneum and many organs in there.  Surgery #1 was halted once they saw the spread.  I'm just feeling so ground down and wondering, why me?  I'm wondering if I should get an actual prognosis or would it just depress me further.  Most of the time, I try to stay positive with a 'I can beat this' approach but sometimes the tidal wave just takes me out.

Comments

  • Fearless_Moderator
    Fearless_Moderator Moderator
    Welcome to the world we call Ovarian Cancer @BellaDonna1959 I know that sounds trite but truly you're not alone in how you're feeling. These waves of sadness, confusion, despair are normal. Every one of us has been where you are today.  

    Love to have you join us at the live online chat at 1pm ET today if you're able and interested. Perhaps we can help with perspective and lighten your load a bit.  But I'm a bit taken back by your lack of specifics at this point.  What cancer centre are you attached to? Do you have an assigned oncologist who's treating you?  How often do you meet and how does he/she respond when you ask for answers to your questions.

    I can tell you that if they have yet to determine the type your cancer is they can't give you a prognosis, and this early a prognosis is just a big GUESS.  That's why they do look so grim.  They quote from a bunch of very old statistics and based on normative averages.  I'm 3C, high grade, serous.  I was told 3 years maximum.  Here I am in my 6th year of treatment.  The world of OVC has changed remarkably the past five years with so much new research, so many new clinical trials taking place, and so many new treatments now approved and available. 

    Stay strong gal and focus your energies and emotions on getting the answers you need.  And stay fixed on the good in your life..there is lots, if you do look for it.  And finally but not finally, your cancer centre likely has a social work department. Get a referral to one of there social workers.  Mine has been enormously helpful keeping me centred and grounded. And stay connected here.  You're not alone.  You have a community of close to 1000 across the country who've walked in your shoes and so many of them will tell you the early days were the darkest but over time they've been amazed at how strong and resilient they've become.  

    Hope to 'see' you on the chat today at 1pm ET or any time you feel the need to reach out.  Just sign in and click on the topic titled TEAL THURSDAYS...... to enter the chat.  REgardless, please stay in touch and reach out any time.  \\

     <3 
  • BellaDonna1959
    BellaDonna1959
    Thanks.  I appreciate your comments.  My biopsy was inconclusive unfortunately.  They 'think' is hi grade but aren't sure yet. Waiting on some PK test and overall genetic tests - takes MONTHS apparently.  Very hard to wait.  After chemo 1 my CA-125 was only down 12% - a bit discouraging. Everything seems to take forever.  I hope for good news though in the near future.  I'm at Credit Valley Hosp in Mississauga.

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