My good friend dropped a book off to me today which I thought might be helpful to any one of you. It is entitled "No Cure For Being Human" by Kate Bowler
This book "hit home" for me. I believe it was "the right book at the right time".
I received info last week from my latest CT scan that it showed NED which is fantastic but still I had and still have lingering thoughts and reflections of this disease and my journey.
A little excerpt from the book that I found fitting to "our" situations:
"....tradition has special language for our three experiences of time: tragic, apocalyptic, and pastoral.
Tragic time is the grand theories. The problem of evil has swept away the illusion that all things will be made right, and suddenly we wonder at the goodness of the world.
Apocalyptic time is related but not identical. The veil has been lifted and we see ourselves on the brink. Systems are irredeemable broken and injustice reigns.
Pastoral time is marked by the seasons, the sowing and reaping and herding that keeps the land tilled and the herds fenced."
I believe we go through these 3 stages from the onset of symptoms/diagnosis to the final outcome. I know I wondered "why" "why me" "what's next" "what will the outcome be" "will I make it". How can I keep everyone together and solid through this while receiving the support I need?
In another part of the book that hit home for me was "This body was my home. No matter how hard I try, that's gone."
I, for one, have felt this. I am not sure I know the answer to this. Accepting what the new norm is.....what activities can I return too? Will I have the strength to do it without getting fatigued. Scars are scars.....I believe it is a reminder of what we have overcome.
Another part of the book says, "We're never done dear. Even when we're done, we're never done."
I think this best explains....why we go on, why we try that next step/treatment/trial drug. Why we would choose to have more chemo or radiation? Why if we are at end stages, we make choices that will live on in memories?
For those questioning things at the early on stage, to those finishing treatment and facing possible recurrences....I truly hope you will read this book and be more at peace with it all. I had tears reading some of it as it rang true in so many ways but the book is hopeful at the same time.
The final quote I will leave with is:
"We do too much, never enough, and are done before we've even started."
I think that about sums it up.💕💕